10 Leadership Virtues for Disruptive Times

What kind of leader are you when everything around you is shifting—when old rules don’t apply, when your team is dispersed across Zoom screens, and when uncertainty defines every day? In 10 Leadership Virtues for Disruptive Times, Tom Ziglar challenges you to rethink leadership itself. He argues that in chaos and technological transformation, the most powerful tool you have isn’t strategy or skill—it’s character. His central claim: The leaders who thrive during disruption are those who coach with virtue, modeling timeless values that build trust, connection, and growth in the people they serve.

Ziglar, son of the legendary motivational speaker Zig Ziglar, calls this approach Coach Leadership. These leaders don’t command from authority—they cultivate from authenticity. They don’t merely manage results; they develop people. In this book, Ziglar reframes leadership as a moral and relational craft founded on ten enduring virtues: kindness, selflessness, respect, humility, self-control, positivity, looking for the best, being the light, never giving up, and standing firm.

The Crisis of Modern Leadership

Ziglar opens with the backdrop we all know—the COVID‑19 pandemic and the digital revolution that accelerated remote work and personal upheaval. Leaders once defined by positional power are now being asked to lead from empathy, clarity, and trust. The “T. rex manager,” who rules by fear and control, now faces extinction. His arms are too short for the new reach of distributed teams. In contrast, the Coach Leader leads through questions, collaboration, and connection. He or she creates a work atmosphere that makes people want to engage, even when the office has vanished.

As Ziglar’s father often said, “You don’t build a business; you build people, and people build the business.” Tom adds the modern spin: You coach people so they can build themselves. His book becomes a blueprint for doing that in times when technology, strategy, or cultural change could otherwise fracture trust.

Three Dimensions of Virtuous Leadership

The ten virtues unfold across three main dimensions. First, Who we need to be —the inner qualities that anchor a leader’s identity: kindness, selflessness, respect, humility. Second, How we need to be—the expressive attitudes that prepare teams for growth: self‑control, positivity, and looking for the best. Finally, What needs to be done now—the active behaviors that guide teams through disruption: being the light, never giving up, and standing firm. Each section shows how these virtues shape an environment where people flourish rather than fear.

Ziglar pairs moral conviction with practical coaching techniques. He uses examples such as Matt McKinley, who built his company’s culture around a team “Wheel of Life” assessment, and Doc Rivers, the NBA coach who motivated multimillion‑dollar athletes by asking permission to hold them accountable. These real-world stories illustrate that virtue isn’t theoretical—it’s operational. It can be measured in engagement, retention, and transformation.

Virtue as a Competitive Advantage

In times of change, technical knowledge decays quickly. A workflow that solved problems last year may be obsolete today. But virtue endures. By practicing attributes such as humility and kindness, leaders create psychological safety—the condition Google’s Aristotle project identified as the core of effective teams. Ziglar argues that disruption is not an obstacle but a stage upon which virtue can perform. The leaders who 'outrun the bear,' as in his wilderness metaphor, are not faster—they’re more adaptable, more curious, and more compassionate.

He even glimpses the futuristic context—quantum computing, AI, virtual reality—and reminds readers that as technology replaces tasks, human trust and moral grounding will become the rare competitive advantage. The Coach Leader, fluent in compassion and integrity, becomes indispensable.

Why These Ideas Matter Now

Tom Ziglar’s message resonates because the pandemic revealed something timeless: people don’t crave perfect systems—they crave leaders they can trust. Quality of life now equals quality of work. Remote teams need inclusion, communication, and psychological safety more than directives or metrics. The virtues he describes aren’t soft skills—they’re strategic assets. They bridge the gap between pain and vision, making innovation and resilience possible when disruption strikes.

The big idea is simple but profound: character may be the oldest technology, but it’s still the most powerful. If you master the art of Coach Leadership—living out these ten virtues—you’ll not only lead through change, but redefine success as growth, purpose, and legacy. That’s how you transform disruption into destiny.

Ziglar begins his list of ten virtues with one that feels deceptively simple: kindness. But he treats it not as niceness or politeness—it’s leadership in action. He sees kindness as an atmosphere changer, the primary vaccine against anxiety and isolation in disrupted workplaces. “Constant kindness can accomplish much,” he quotes Albert Schweitzer, explaining that kindness melts misunderstanding the way sunlight melts ice.

The Three-Step Conversation

For Ziglar, kindness starts with curiosity. His three-step conversation asks: What is your team member thinking, feeling, and doing right now? What do you want them to be thinking, feeling, and doing? How can you demonstrate kindness through your attitude, effort, and skill to help them get there? This reframing makes kindness measurable—it becomes an intentional act of empathy and support rather than random goodwill.

Respond, Don’t React

When someone 'goes off,' Ziglar teaches leaders to ask, “Would a secure person do that?” The answer is no. Understanding that anger and criticism stem from insecurity changes your role from combatant to coach. You respond with composure instead of reacting emotionally. Kindness becomes the mirror that reflects strength without hostility—an essential skill for the hybrid world, where tone and empathy convey more than authority.

The Kindness Blind Spot

In an interview with researcher Shaunti Feldhahn, Ziglar explores what prevents everyday kindness. Feldhahn’s research showed that 89 percent of relationships improved after participants did her Thirty-Day Kindness Challenge—actively withholding negative comments, offering daily praise, and performing small acts of generosity. Most people think they’re already kind, she found, but habitually act unkindly without realizing it. Kindness must be re-learned as practice.

Real leaders, according to Ziglar, use kindness to melt walls of distrust. He tells stories like Frank Stewart’s—who lent his jacket and tie to an underdressed new hire so the young man could stay for training—or David Mattson’s—who traveled overseas at a moment’s notice to replace a colleague unable to fly due to a family emergency. These aren’t grand gestures; they’re instant moral decisions that define culture. Kindness, lived consistently, builds loyalty, morale, and creativity.

In a world flooded by digital noise and performance pressure, Ziglar reminds you that no technology can automate heart. Kindness is the leader’s quiet superpower—it changes atmospheres, saves relationships, and opens minds to learning. Practiced daily, it turns disruption into trust and fear into community.

Selflessness, Ziglar writes, is not weakness—it’s the art of splitting the steak. In his story about sharing a meal with his father, Tom cuts a 65/35 portion to see if his dad will take the smaller piece, testing his lifelong model of humility in action. The elder Ziglar’s quiet choice teaches that real leadership isn’t about taking more; it’s about serving more.

From Me to We

The Coach Leader’s mindset shifts from 'I and Me' to 'Us and We.' It means finding joy when others succeed, and making their growth your own reward. Selflessness bridges personal ambition with collective purpose. Ziglar draws from Les Brown’s advice—help others achieve their dreams and you will achieve yours—and his father’s classic quote: “You can have everything in life you want if you help enough other people get what they want.”

Thirteen Ways to Practice Selflessness

Ziglar gives a detailed playbook: express gratitude for your team, learn the 'why behind the why,' create dream alignment between personal and organizational goals, listen deeply, and literally—or figuratively—wash their feet, echoing Jesus’s model of servant leadership. He tells stories of managers who took over undesirable tasks for their employees or created “nice to have” traditions—small thoughtful gifts to show people they’re valued.

Throughout, he shows how selflessness builds credibility. When leaders give credit away, admit mistakes, and serve without expectations, they activate trust. And when they practice empathy—transforming irritation into understanding—they transform workplace tension into cooperation.

Sacrifice and Reward

Stories from the book reinforce that sacrifice pays back in influence. Dennis Johnson carried Gatorade jugs for an injured towel boy; a boss paid an employee’s salary through her child’s illness; and a trainer carried a one‑legged army veteran across a Tough Mudder race. Each story highlights selflessness as the currency of leadership—acts that can’t be mandated but can be modeled.

Selflessness, Ziglar insists, isn’t counter to success—it’s the force that multiplies it. In times of disruption, when autonomy and ego threaten unity, serving first creates an atmosphere of mutual loyalty. Leaders who live this virtue will see their teams serve one another—and their organizations thrive.

Respect, as Ziglar defines it, is the currency that allows all other virtues to flow. You give it before you get it. Rooted in his upbringing, he recalls how his parents forbade profanity and self‑deprecating speech—it shaped his view that language reflects leadership. Respect is how we acknowledge dignity across difference, even amid disagreement.

Creating a Culture of Respect

Ziglar warns that cancel culture is the enemy of respectful leadership. You can’t gain respect by demeaning others. Respect means acknowledging another person’s right to their beliefs, even if you don’t share them. He shares Krish Dhanam’s story from a government training program: when cultural friction appeared among toll-booth workers, Krish reframed diversity around 'cultural similarity'—respecting shared human values rather than focusing on division.

Ten Ways to Grow Respect

Ziglar lists ten practices: respect yourself through growth and boundaries; define what respect means to you; communicate and listen in others’ language (using the DISC profiles); see others’ perspectives; ask questions first; celebrate wins meaningfully; keep your word; scale trust in every interaction; eliminate gossip; and let your virtues lead your actions. Each step shifts the dynamic from control to collaboration.

He ties respect to trust and the absence of gossip, which he calls “relational radiation.” You destroy integrity when you talk to someone who can’t fix the issue. Coach Leaders protect the emotional safety of their teams by ensuring inclusion, fairness, and opportunity for contribution—reinforcing findings from Google’s study on psychological safety.

Celebration, Safety, and Voice

Respect thrives when everyone is heard. Ziglar’s 'AIR' system—Appreciation, Inspiration, Recognition—structures meetings to start with gratitude. He encourages leaders to track who speaks in meetings, ensuring all voices get airtime. These rituals turn respect into process. They make people feel valued rather than tolerated.

Respect doesn’t always mean agreement—it means care. In a hybrid world where physical cues are lost, respecting tone, timing, and individuality is how leaders humanize digital work. To respect is to see. And being seen is what sustains engagement when everything else changes.

Humility, Ziglar writes, is power with restraint—meekness with muscle. He positions it as the antidote to arrogance and entitlement, which blind leaders in times of change. Citing C. S. Lewis, he reminds, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” It’s the difference between arguing to win and questioning to discover truth.

Performance vs. Growth Confidence

Arrogant leaders depend on wins to feel secure. Humble leaders find confidence in learning. When everything changes—the pandemic, quantum computing, automation—their adaptability keeps them alive. Tom introduces “humalogy,” a concept from futurist Scott Klososky describing the spectrum between human input and technology. Leaders must balance both and have the humility to keep learning as tech reshapes leadership.

Ask Better Questions

Ziglar uses his mentor Bob Tiede’s example to show humility through inquiry. When overwhelmed by ideas, Bob challenged him, “You’re asking the wrong question—not ‘How do I do this?’ but ‘Who should do this?’” Humility means recognizing you’re not the smartest person in the room but maybe the connector who brings in those who are. In business terms, this mirrors Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy’s Who Not How model—leaders amplify results by decentralizing ego.

Ziglar urges leaders to ask their team: What can I learn from you? What did you consider before acting? These questions signal vulnerability and invite collaboration. Humility fuels curiosity, which unlocks creativity—a crucial capability in remote innovation.

Brokenness and Boldness

Drawing on Christian themes, Ziglar describes “brokenness” not as defeat but dependence—acknowledging we need help beyond ourselves. Speaking “the truth in love” becomes the humble leader’s boldest act. He connects this to workplace truth-telling: confronting gossip, misalignment, or poor performance with grace and values‑based dialogue. Howard Partridge’s method of asking how a behavior aligns with company mission and values transforms confrontation into clarity.

Humility, then, isn’t passive. It’s the courage to stand for truth without ego. It enables leaders to listen, learn, and lift people up. The humble leader asks more, commands less, and helps others shine. As Ziglar puts it, “It’s about them, not you.” In disruptive times, that humility might just be the most advanced technology of all.

In high-pressure environments, self-control separates leaders who last from those who implode. Ziglar calls it 'how we face the future.' It’s not suppression; it’s mastery of your inner story. The way you think—your self-talk—determines how you respond when attacked, criticized, or overwhelmed.

Responding vs. Reacting

Through Mahongo Fumbelo’s moving story, Ziglar shows self-control in action. When a supervisor told her she’d “never be a trainer,” she resisted the urge to explode. Instead, she prayed, reflected, and chose belief over bitterness. Within years, she became one of Australia’s top speakers—later hired by the same company that rejected her. Her restraint transformed insult into opportunity.

Ziglar outlines three keys for maintaining composure: know your belief and purpose; ask if a secure person would act that way; and use a mental model to prepare for stress. If disruption exposes you, preparation protects you. Review how you’ll think, breathe, and speak before crises arrive.

The Story You Tell Yourself

Self-control begins with inner language. Replace “I’m not enough” with “I’m here to serve.” Ziglar coaches leaders to reframe attacks as tests of mission. When an angry client erupts, remind yourself: “Would a secure person say that?” This redirects emotion into empathy—shifting power without aggression.

Modeling Calm Under Pressure

Thomas Jody’s experience at an auto shop exemplifies this virtue. Confronted by a raging customer, he calmly asked him to return after cooling off. The next day, the man apologized and became a loyal client. The shop’s mechanics watched—and learned how restraint builds respect faster than retaliation. Your team watches your reaction more than your words. Self-control isn’t just self-leadership—it’s social modeling.

Ziglar reminds us that disruption magnifies pressure. By practicing inner calm through gratitude, reflection, and clarity of purpose, you convert stress into influence. Self-control is a shield—it doesn’t protect your ego; it protects your legacy.

Positivity, Ziglar insists, is not naïve optimism—it’s disciplined hope. As he jokes, “I’m so positive I’d go after Moby Dick in a rowboat and bring the tartar sauce.” The point is perspective: your attitude is a strategic advantage. Disruption tests morale more than strategy, and positivity keeps your team moving when fear says freeze.

You Don’t Have to Like Everything You Do

Through a vivid story of his father’s workout with trainer Chris Patterson, Ziglar teaches that positivity means pushing through discomfort. When Zig refused to stop lifting heavy weights, he grinned, “You don’t have to like everything you do.” This sums up the virtue—joy in purpose, not ease. Positive leaders distinguish between happiness and meaning: they focus on mission, knowing temporary pain produces long-term growth.

Turning Challenge into Culture

Ziglar reframes negative events—lost revenue, team shake-ups—as chances to spark gratitude and creativity. His 'Halftime Speech' teaches leaders to rally teams that fall behind. Start with positivity, be prepared, express gratitude, recall victories, clarify problems, focus on solutions, and plan action. Like a coach at halftime, positivity realigns purpose and reminds people of their strength.

He illustrates positivity through Peter Drucker’s insight: 'Culture eats strategy for breakfast.' A positive leader creates a culture that absorbs shocks. While strategy may fail, a hopeful culture endures. Ziglar’s mission statements—like “to provide the most phenomenal home-buying experience possible”—show that positive intent fuels performance.

Practical Positivity

Use gratitude lists, celebration rituals, and 'victory boards' to redirect energy. During downturns, Ziglar advises pausing for gratitude: you can’t be thankful and angry simultaneously. Positive leaders balance realism with resilience—they explain facts but emphasize agency: What can we control? What can we learn?

Ultimately, positivity isn’t about ignoring the storm—it’s about steering through it. When everything gets harder, your optimism reminds people why to keep rowing. In Ziglar’s model, a positive leader becomes the emotional thermostat—setting the temperature for courage and collaboration.

The final virtues—Never Giving Up and Standing Firm—teach endurance and integrity. Ziglar calls patience the rock beneath leadership. “Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone,” he quotes Alan Watts, urging restraint in chaos. Perseverance becomes spiritual discipline: seeing challenges as strengthening exercises rather than setbacks.

Endurance with Purpose

Ziglar advises leaders to 'consider it all joy' when trial comes, referencing James 1:2–3. Each disruption builds endurance muscles. He shares his “Perfect Start” routine—morning gratitude, reflection, reading, journaling, and problem-solving—to train mental resilience. Leaders who win mornings win crises.

Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

Borrowing from the U.S. Marines, he introduces their triad of perseverance: improvise, adapt, overcome. Change demands experimentation. Never giving up doesn’t mean pushing the same broken plan—it means having courage to dump old plans and invent new ones. He warns leaders to update five‑year strategies rapidly or become irrelevant.

Standing firm adds a moral layer. It’s about your “warrior spine and open heart”—his core metaphor from The Greatest Showman. Like Hugh Jackman’s posture at the finale—chin up, chest out, arms open—it represents both confidence and vulnerability. You lead with conviction and compassion simultaneously.

Integrity as Lighthouse

In storms, followers look to leaders who hold moral ground. Ziglar’s concept of trust as “the by-product of integrity” matches Patrick Lencioni’s insight that vulnerability fuels teamwork. Sharing your story—the struggles, mistakes, and recoveries—creates identification. People follow leaders they relate to, not ones pretending perfection.

Enduring leaders combine patience, creativity, and principle. They dance until it rains, as Ziglar’s Australian anecdote puts it. Disruption isn’t the enemy—it’s the proving ground. Standing firm ensures that even when the world changes, your values do not.